Every couple of days, I see a new Facebook entry from a guy I went to high school with. High school was a long time ago and I was very happy when he sent me a friend request. I responded quickly to his request.

In less than 24 hours, the happiness of having the opportunity to “reconnect” with an old friend went away. It was clear to me that his sole intent of sending the friend request was to get me excited about his network marketing opportunity.

Ok, you know I’m not against network marketing opportunities so don’t go down that path.

My disappointment was that his friend request was not genuine. He didn’t want to renew an old friendship, he wanted to sell me something. As someone he once knew, I guess I was a ripe target for his presentation.

Nothing more!

I got over it quickly. But, I haven’t forgotten his tactic.

I have not hidden him from my Facebook page (yet). In fact, I’ve watched his postings with great interest – trying to determine if his advances are working.

As near as I can tell, NOBODY has ever replied or made a comment to his postings about his product / business. Interestingly, he gets several posts when he talks about his kids and his family but even those comments seem to be dwindling.

Yet, his same routine continues.
3-4 times per week, he posts something about XYZ Company and how it’s completely changed his life. Followed by “click here to watch this great movie and see for yourself” or some link to something he wants to be seen.

In effect, it is like he’s walking down a sidewalk screaming at anyone that will listen.

People forget that social media is personal. If you want to communicate with me and show interest in me, I may be open to your interests too – including your business and product interests.
However, if you’re blatantly “friending” me just so I can be subjected to your pitch, I have better things to do.

What about asking about my family, my interests or my career? And, ask all of that FIRST. You may find out that I have NO interest in your product or opportunity or you may find out that I have a desperate need for what you’re offering. Either way, we’re friends. And, there will be no bridges burned.

You never know, if I say “no” right now, I may say “yes” later. Things change! My opinion/ needs may change too. But, if my first exposure to you is your “screaming”, you will never know.

I just think so many field leaders are messing up their “social networking” efforts.

What are you teaching your field organizations about social networking? Are they selling (screaming) first and asking questions later? If so, they are probably not getting many questions answered. However, if they are asking questions and being genuinely interested in creating dialog, they have a chance to take the renewed relationships into business topics.

And, according to my friend Todd Smith, social media student & teacher, that dialog should happen offline – not in front of the world on Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, etc.

Nothing replaces interpersonal relationships. It’s the lifeblood of direct selling.

Use social networking to build trust and relationships.

Once established, TALK!

Person to person!

You know, like we used to do before e-mail.